Were you listening at all?
This is one of the most common types. It involves a student asking a question that repeats, practically verbatim, what the teacher just said. Example from my class this week:
Ms. Dempsey: This is a quiz. You may use your notes and your homework as a reference. That means get out your notes and use them on this quiz.
Roberta: May we use notes on this quiz?
Didn't you just hear your classmate?
This is when a second student asks the same question that the student before just asked. My favorite is when this is combined with the first kind and they not only didn't hear me the first time, but also his/her classmate. Example that occurred directly after Roberta's question:
Bob: Wait, can we use notes on the quiz?
Do you think I'm lying to you?
This form of stupid question usually results from a student who is paranoid or has a math phobia. They ask the same question twenty times because they just can't believe that your answer is true.
Ms. D: You do not need to write down the original problem for word problems, but you do for every other kind. Here's how you can remember: Don't write any words, just numbers and variables. I'll say it again: if it has words, don't write it.
Vanessa: Do we need to write the words for numbers 1-3?
Ms. D: Nope
Vanessa: What about the instructions?
Ms. D: Remember, if it has words don't write it.
Vanessa: I don't get it. Do I have to write the words for numbers 1-3?
Ms. D: No, just answer it.
Vanessa: Wait...
Ms. D: Repeat after me: I do not need to write the words
Vanessa: What?
Ms. D: I'm serious, say it.
Vanessa: I don't need to write the words.
Are you messing with me or do you really not understand what I'm saying?
I give instructions all day long and I feel like I'm pretty clear most of the time, but sometimes I'm not sure. The best is when I'm directing a kid to a location in the room. They refuse to count and many of my directions involve counting: it's the third drawer down, the second cabinet, the fourth tray...
Bob: Where should my quiz go?
Ms. D: In the period three box.
Bob: Which one's that?
Ms. D: The third box down.
Bob: What?
Ms. D: See the stack of six trays? Count from the top, when you get to three that's the third box.
Bob: What?
Ms. D: Put your hand on the top tray. Say the number one.
Bob: One
Ms. D: Good, keep counting.
Bob: What? This one?
Ms. D: No, that's the second one, find the third.
Bob: This one?
Ms. D: That's the fourth. Find the third!
Ummm...why don't you take a sec to think about that one?
Kids ask me questions where the answer feels so obvious that they are answering it themselves as they ask it. I sometimes think they're messing with me, but the look of stupid confusion covers their faces and I know they really don't know what they're asking.
Ms. D: I'm returning your homework that you turned in on Wednesday. It is graded so you may keep it in your notebook.
Joe: Is this my homework?
Ms. D: Yes.
Joe: Should I turn it in?Ms. D: No, I'm returning it to you.
Joe: Where should I put it?
Ms. D: In your notebook.
Joe: Where in my notebook?
Ms. D: Seriously, which of your five sections do you think your homework should go in?
Joe: The homework section?
Ms. D: Bingo!
Now imagine a classroom of such questions six times over five days a week and that is the life of a teacher. It doesn't seem to matter how old or well educated the students are, you will always find a stupid question in your classroom. So the next time a teacher says, "There are no stupid questions," know that the teacher is lying and even she doesn't believe the truth in that statement.
