Questions

I'm a pretty happy person. It takes a lot to rile me up. Here are couple things that make me actually so angry that I'm willing to show that anger and even say something about it:

1) The adult bookstore by my house makes me furious. Mostly because they tore down some ugly building and started building this gorgeous place with flagstones and good landscaping and I thought, "finally, something to make our community more beautiful!" and wouldn't you know, it's a store designed to profit from the sin and weaknesses of others. Ohhh, I hate that building and all that it stands for and I pray that it will go out of business so it can stop assisting people in ruining their lives.

2) I get mad when people go against a member of my family. This rarely happens, but I seriously wanted to find the people who once pulled a gun on my brother (years ago) and chase them down and explain to them the value of life...with my fists. This is probably not the best reaction to have for many reasons, but my anger in this case makes me irrational.

3) I get mad when people think that my faith makes me stupid or that I must be stupid to have faith. There is a billboard up right now that states: "Faith does not have the answers, it impedes questions."

     I get mad at this for two reasons, the first that people are advertising lies about my faith to encourage me to believe in their universalism (or atheism). I am assuming the next part, since I don't really know the beliefs of the creators of this billboard, but I assume they believe in relative truth. Many people believe that truth is relative with respect to each individual. Like I may believe that purple elephants created the world and you may believe that it was actually yellow turtles and that neither of us has a right to declare one to be true over the other. One is true for you and the other is true for me. No truth can be proven absolutely, so there is no absolute truth. This kind of relativistic tolerance is given to everyone as long as everyone subscribes to this relativistic tolerance. I can believe what I believe as long as I agree that my truth might not be the only truth. But that, in itself is a statement of truth. It is an axiom of living. People who believe their is no absolute truth, believe absolutely in a truth that there is no absolute truth.  It's a paradox. Everyone believes in something, even people who believe in nothing, that's a belief. I get mad because these people are trying to convince me to stop believing in my truth and start believing in theirs, by declaring belief to be a stupid thing. It's simply illogical.

The second reason I get mad is that they say that faith impedes questions. I'm assuming they mean that my faith tells me or forces me to squelch my questions and just blindly follow what is put before me as truth. My faith says that I must turn off any inquisitive intellectual devices within me, and just believe. I am less mad about this and more eager to clarify.
   I teach math, a subject which people are quite willing to express their frustrations with, loathing of, and general inability to understand. "I'm just not a math person" "I don't have a math gene" "I was never good at math". Math is not a mystery which only the smartest can unravel (well, some of the crazier stuff, yes, but not algebra). People just haven't seen it expressed in the best way for them to understand it. But because of possibly poor teaching, people assume that all math is too hard for them.
   Faith is like this. There are people who are people of faith who say to people with questions, "You just have to believe, stop asking questions!" I'm sure there are plenty of people who have had questions about the hows, whats, whys, and even some I'm not sures about Christianity and have been told that questioning is wrong. So I see why the billboard may have said what it says, but please don't attribute all faith with the failings of some of its followers. Just as I ask you to not attribute your frustrations with mathematics to math itself, but in the way it was presented to you.
    You see, God created us with intelligent, curious, inquisitive minds and asks us to use them. He created so many things with so many complex mysteries and presents them to us as a puzzle to be solved. But, just like any good teacher, God exposes us to the puzzle, asks us to question and guides us to the truth. I reward my students for asking good questions, and I reward them for answering these questions, but I don't say, "Sure, you can believe that," for any and every answer they give. I tell them they are wrong if they are wrong and to keep trying until they get it right. Sometimes I give them the answers, sometimes I give them the steps and guidelines they must follow to get to the right answer, and sometimes I let them discover the truth for themselves. God is like this with us. Some answers he just plain gives us, some he presents guidelines for, some we must discover on our own, and some we must accept as unknowable mysteries to be revealed later.
   I am sorry for people who feel like faith is for blind, unquestioning followers. I am angry at people who think that I throw aside my logical or scientific brain when I approach scripture and faith. And I really want to tear down that billboard (although I believe in the freedom of speech, and I'm totally against vandalism...)but I hope that I live my life in such a way that people see that intelligence and faith do have a place together. That my creative, wise,logical, intelligent God welcomes my questions and fills me with the answers either in this world or the next.

  So bring on your questions, God welcomes them. The answers I find only make my faith stronger.

Because of Him

If I ever thought I was smart, it's because of him.

If I ever loved the blues, it's because of him.

If I ever realized that ice cream can cure any bad day,  it's because of him.

If I ever thought that I was good at music, or writing, or singing, or acting, or dancing, or any other art I attempted, it's because of him.

If I ever learned the importance of being a good friend,  it's because of him.

If I ever used movie quotes interspersed in my conversations,  it's because of him.

If I ever loved learning, it's because of him.

If I ever wondered how something worked or why something happened, it's because of him.

If I ever loved an old movie, it's because of him.

If I ever thought that I was strong and able, it's because of him.

If I ever read a book to savor the beauty of a well written sentence, it's because of him.

If I ever thought a boy was an idiot,  it's because of him.

If I ever felt so confident that I knew I could do what others could not,  it's because of him.

If I ever loved science fiction,  it's because of him.

If I ever learned how to rebuild an engine, it's because of him.

If I ever loved rap,  it's because of him.

If I ever felt like I was special and important,  it's because of him.

If I ever loved the ocean, it's because of him.

If I ever knew that I had something to offer the world to make it better,  it's because of him.

If I ever saw the importance of family, it's because of him.

If I ever felt like there was no place I could fall where I would not be caught, it's because of him.

If I ever felt safe, it's because of him.

If I ever desired to serve God and seek Him, it's because of him.

If I ever thought that all firemen were brave and strong and kind and handsome, it's because of him.

Happy Birthday to my dear Dad. He somehow was able to make me simultaneously feel like his little girl and empower me to be a strong woman. I could ask for no better father. It's because of him that I am me. Thanks, Daddy.

Children Should Be Heard

  I am good with kids. I have known that since I started being old enough to say, "I'm good with kids." I've tried to figure out why it is that I can relate to kids and talk with them and have them talk and relate to me. Part of it is certainly because I love things that are kid-like. I enjoy bubbles, coloring with sidewalk chalk, dancing to anything, novels meant for kids, tv shows meant for kids, and just being silly. But I've decided the most important reason is that I listen.
   I've recently been observing other adults and their interactions with kids. Some adults can't hear kids as they continually shout out, begging for attention. Some talk over kids in the middle of a story and start talking to another adult because they don't think what the kid is saying is valid. Some respond with a simple "oh really" while they are doing something else. I've also seen some who look kids in the eye while they speak. Who pause in conversation to listen. Who ask questions and respond like they want to know the answer. Who actually have conversations with kids as if they are people and matter.
    See, that's the key. Listening to someone tells that person that you think he or she matters. What you have to say and what you think about things and what you have done is worth hearing. When do kids become valid human members of society? Some might say adulthood, some when they get a job, some when they can talk. I say that all of childhood is a time when you are valid. You matter no matter how old or intelligent or learned or intelligible you are. So when a 3 year old at church wants to tell me about her dress, how is that any less valid than me wanting to tell people about my dress. And when a twelve year old is telling me about a book she loves, I want to know (mostly because I'll probably love it too).
     So often kids feel like they are not heard, like they don't yet matter. But they do matter! They are a functional and integral part of our society and they deserve to be heard. And just think about what you teach a kid when you listen. You teach them that respect is given to everyone no matter who they are, what they look like, or their age. You teach them how to listen by being a listener. You teach them that words have power. You teach them that they are valuable and have a purpose. You teach them to think of themselves in a communal way - a way that can lead to seeing outside of themselves and looking to others.
    The next time you see a kid, I challenge you to ask them a question. Start with, "How's school?" if you are feeling uncreative. But you might move into, "reading anything interesting?" or "what shows are you watching?" or "would you ever want to live in another country?" or "do you think that aliens have art?" or "what makes you happy?" or "who's your best friend?" It may be awkward and you may have to carry a large part of the conversation, but it doesn't matter. What the kid will hear is, "I'm interested in knowing more about you." The key is, when they answer - listen!

An Interesting Fact About You

Every year my kids fill out info cards about themselves: phone numbers, birthday, etc. But my favorite is an interesting fact they tell me about themselves. Most are about what sports they play or a talent they have, but some are just an excellent reflection of why I love to teach junior high. Here are some top samplings:

I like to play with my nails

I am a girl

I am boring. I do nothing.

PC NOT Mac

I love Pandas

I go to church every day

My favorite hobby is math and I love to play sports

I am aware of my surroundings and the people around me

In chess, I can beat everyone I know except for the computer.

I love and have a propensity of always using more complex vocabulary words when conversing with anyone when possible.

I mostly get "F's" in math. I don't know why.

I love to read Harry Potter books.

I have the same birthday as my sisters.

I don't know much Spanish.

(one girl's was a bulleted list):

•       I'm just a simple and nice girl
•       creative
•       nice with lettering

I am your student.

I have 2 ducks, 12 doves, and 3 parrots.

I like to dive in the pool and I can snap my finger really fast.

I like red, black, gray, white, and werewolves.

I love my sleep.

I like holding my lizards.

I could climb a lot of stuff.

In bsa (boy scouts of america) and courteous, scientific

I like to travel around the world.

I have a twin sister named Margaret. Don't get mixed up. :)

I know much about the Japanese culture.

There are haunted dolls up my attic. Really creepy. They appear every day on the ground. Then they disappear in a hour.


                This is going to be a fabulous school year...   

Waiting in Line at Comic-Con is Different from Waiting in Line Anywhere Else

Comic-con is a wonderful experience and part of that experience is waiting in line. It may seem like waiting in line would be a bad part, but it actually is pretty awesome. People are prepared for the wait and it's expected, so you show up hours before you want to see something and just embrace the wait. And while you wait, you get to thinking about how different this kind of waiting is from any other kind and I decided to analyze the why's and how's of this phenomenon.

1) Most of the people in line are really nice. If you are waiting in line for the DMV or even a movie premier, there is always bound to be some jerk or person who you just wish would go away, but I've enjoyed every line buddy I've made. Everyone seems pretty excited and patient and they like all the same stuff you do, so there's no need to explain what a TARDIS is or why you have on a ridiculous orange and yellow hat.

2) People bring books with them. I'm not just talking kindles or nooks, I'm talking full on novels. Like books that are over 500 pages and with small print. And not just a few people bring books, I'd say close to 40% do. And it's a beautiful thing when you don't feel a social stigma for pulling out a novel that's called Plague with pictures of superhero kids on the cover and reading it in public - a beautiful thing.

3) People are friendly, but they also don't mind being socially awkward. In the middle of a conversation, if someone gets a text (a major form of comic-con communication) that person doesn't excuse themselves from the conversation or ignore it, he/she just whips out his/her phone and starts to respond. They might even do this while still talking to you or just start ignoring you. It's totally acceptable protocol at SDCC.

4) Unlike Disneyland, the people wearing costumes are not paid to be there.

5) Strangers shout out at other strangers about what you are wearing and their opinion of it. This is especially true if you are wearing a costume or a shirt that is a subtle homage to a favorite tv show or movie. I wore a shirt last year that had the orange orange logo from Chuck - I got a lot of shout outs about that one.

6) Cutting in line is acceptable and expected. You may be one person alone in line one minute and then ten minutes later you are joined by five of your friends. No one huffs at you saving seats or spots in line because they have done it too. It's the only way to travel.

7) A three hour wait doesn't seem that long. You bring food and games and entertainment and make friends and have a seat and prepare for the journey. It goes by pretty fast and it's amazing how fun the wait can be.

    Comic-con is a people watching mecca. I suggest, if you love to people watch, try to get yourself a ticket for at least one day so you can sit in line and experience it for yourself. It really is its own little world.

My Comic-Con 2011 Top Ten

  I went to Comic-Con for my second time and this time I went for the whole shebang, four days of craziness. I got to do many things and had lots of fun. Some people say I have something called the luck of the Dempseys. I don't believe in luck, I think that I just have really great things happen to me a lot. Even the bad stuff often turns out to be good. But after this weekend, I have to wonder about the effects of a certain hat I wore and the amazing things that happened while I wore it.

10) We got to see so many amazing panels: Twilight, Chuck, Fringe (with a charming and living Joshua Jackson), Castle, Eureka, Merlin, Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog sing along, what's hot in young adult fiction, diversity in young adult fiction (where I got to meet and talk with an author I had read recently), two tv premiers: Terra Nova and Alcatraz, and TV Guide's fan favorites with a smorgasbord of celebrities. That may not seem like much, but with 2-3 hours of waiting for each panel, that's quite a lot to accomplish. And except for the Doctor Who panel, that was everything I wanted to see! Well, I did miss Psych :( but I happened to see the main actor from that show while I was in line for the bathroom and that counts for something.

9) I got interviewed while waiting in line for Twilight. I made some references as to how I thought that some members of the panel might be more coherent than others (implying that Kristen Stewart wouldn't be so clear). That got a laugh, but I think I won't make the extras on the DVD, not like the girls screaming Twilight!  I also got to meet Nikki Reed and speak with her (she had a main role in the film). We had excellent seats during the panel, got to see some sneak peaks of some scenes in the film, and heard some good questions and answers including some surprisingly insightful answers from Kristen Stewart.

8) I made many line buddies. You see, half of comic con is just waiting in lines. I mean like sitting down for 3 or more hours waiting to see a panel of people or a movie screening. And when you are sitting in line for so long, you start to make friends with the people around you. And since most of them are nerds like you, you are bound to have things in common. Things like: the Hunger Games is a great book, or David Tennant is the best Doctor, or whether or not Harry Potter will be considered a classic years from now. Also while waiting in line, you get to see lots of interesting costumes. It is a people watching haven!

7) I got to see the Doctor. Doctor Who? Yes. Matt Smith was on a panel with a whole bunch of other great people including Zachary Levi (from Chuck) and Jorge Garcia (Hurley from Lost). He was floppy haired and beautifully British. He was charming, but not David Tennant, but still charming. My friend works for comic con this year and he found out that I liked Dr. Who. I had to miss the main Dr. Who panel, but he said he might be able to get me in to a private signing with the cast!!! He tried to get me in, but by the time I got the text saying that I could come, I was about 2 blocks away and on the wrong floor. I ran through the crowds wearing my huge backpack, which I had just filled with 6 books I had bought (or received for free) on the main exhibition floor. At one point my backpack opened up and books spilled out. People helped me pick them up and I carried them in my arms as I ran down the hall. I got to the door and just missed them. But at least I was several feet from the Doctor himself.

6) The Chuck panel was amazing. It is the last season of the show, a show that was first screened at comic con and basically got its start and support and sustenance from the nerds there. We got free shirts as we entered (after waiting in line for 2 or 3 hours). They showed fun clips and Jeffster sang. They were super funny and entertaining. But the best part was at the end as Chuck (I mean, Zachary Levi) was speaking about why he loves comic con and how he feels about the end of his show. He started to speak about how much he loves the people of comic con and his fans and he started crying...like all manly yet choked up. And then the whole crowd just stood up and started clapping and continued clapping for several minutes. I love overly sentimental moments and this was a great one.

5) So here is one way the hat became magical. You see, last year, my friend wanted a hat from a show called Firefly. It was a sci-fi show that had a short run and a huge following. One of the gruffest characters (played by Adam Baldwin on Chuck) got a hat in one episode from his mother. Now fans of the show wear these yellow, orange, and red knitted hats to show their love for the show. They were selling them for $30 each last year and I told my friend I could make them for $10. I ended up making 4 of them (at a cost of about $10 each) and we wore them at panels where members of the cast were presenting. I was wearing the hat after the Castle panel with Nathan Fillion. A girl came up to me and handed me one of the the tickets we got during the panel. Hers had a special stamp on the back that meant you could go meet the cast at a signing! She gave it to me because I had on the hat that said I was a true fan! I gave it to my friend because she's a truer fan than I am and it would mean more to her.

4) We went to dinner at a restaurant near the convention center. I did not want to wear my hat at this fancy place, but it started to get cold and we were outside, so I put it on. One of my friends noticed an actress from the show, Firefly, was walking right in front of the restaurant. I got up and stood on the sidewalk as she passed. She looked at me, smiled and asked, "Would you like a picture?" Her husband took two pictures of us and they were so nice. I thanked them for allowing us to interrupt their evening and told her I thought she was great.

3) While crossing the street and still wearing my hat I looked at the handsome man walking toward me and threw off my sunglasses while shouting, "You're Nathan Fillion!!", yes, I'm cool like that. He said, "I like your hat," to which I replied, "I do too and you're awesome!" I would have asked for a picture, but we were in the middle of the street and he wasn't stopping.

2) My friend who works at comic con gave my friend a text during the Twilight panel: if you leave now, you can come to a private signing with the Twilight cast. We left right then and ran to where he told us to go. We waited while the workers told us if we got out our phones, cameras or pens or asked for a hug or anything but smile we would be asked to leave. Then we entered the room and met the big three: Taylor Lautner, Rob Pattinson, and Kristen Stewart. Taylor was first and he asked me how I was as he signed my poster. I responded with my usually over excited positivity and he said and I quote, "I like your energy" ha! Rob Pattinson was a little strange but even with a half shaven head, was still good looking. I felt bad about bad mouthing Kristen Stewart earlier, especially as she had actually done a really great job on the panel. So I told her I thought she had some great things to say on the panel and she thanked me and smiled and now I take back half of the things I said about her.

1) And now the most magical of all. I forgot to bring my lunch from the hotel to the convention center. One of my friends was leaving later and she promised to bring it to me. She was in a ballroom far away from the panel we were waiting for. One of my friends waited in line for me while I ran across the street to meet my other friend with the lunch. I was wearing my hat, despite the heat, mostly because I had hat hair. As I was crossing back across the street, I started to walk around a group of people walking the perpendicular direction. I looked and saw that it was Morgan from Chuck! As if I was pushed in a current of a stream, I started walking sideways the wrong direction so that I was in front of him and then I noticed Awesome from Chuck! I finally started walking the right direction (with them instead of backwards in front of them) and said, "I loved your panel, it was awesome!" Captain Awesome gave me a thumbs up and a thanks and a beautiful smile and then I heard from behind, "You've gotta be pretty brave to wear that had in public," and I turned around to see Adam Baldwin himself, the man whose character originated my hat. I turned into goo, incoherent, bumbling goo. "I've always wanted to see you while wearing this hat!" I so eloquently replied. He gave me a hug and asked for my name and said, "We're off to have burgers at the Hard Rock," I don't remember what I said next except it involved stupid words and lots of smiling. I didn't get a picture (another walking in the street thing), but I thought that was the coolest thing to say to a fan and it certainly made my comic-con.

              So we have tickets for next year (which required us to wait in another 3 hour line) and although I am exhausted and thrilled with my time there, I don't know how next year can top the amazing things that happened this year. I'll be sure to bring my hat and the luck of the Dempseys.

Good and Bad

           As I was brushing my teeth tonight, I realized that I still hadn't rescheduled my appointment for my teeth cleaning. I then thought about how bad I am at rescheduling appointments. I then thought about how I needed to wash my car and change the oil and how bad I am about that. I then thought about blogging about how bad I am at things, but that's a little too negative for me so I thought I'd intersperse some things I am good at so I can counterbalance the negativity.

Bad thing 1: Rescheduling appointments...or even scheduling appointments. I like hanging out with people who are my friends. I don't like hanging out with people who hurt me by poking at my teeth and then charge me money for it.

Good thing 1: I'm really good at hanging out with my friends.

Bad thing 2: I'm really bad at selecting a professional to do some job and then feeling confident about my choice. That means I stick with a bad mechanic or dentist just because the idea of having to choose someone else is far more repellent than the state of staying with the bad one I already have. I guess that means I'll never choose divorce...

Good thing 2: I'm really loyal.

Bad thing 3: I am messy. I try to deny it and hold on to the false hope that I am not a messy person, but I am. I don't like to make my bed and if my laundry basket is full I just leave my clothes where they land until I get down to doing laundry.

Good thing 3: I don't ever make people feel bad about having to clear off their front seat so I can sit on the passenger side.

Bad thing 4: I am horribly forgetful. I think it has to do with the fact that I try to do too much and then I don't sleep that much and my brain doesn't work well. I remember stupid and potentially unimportant details like the fact that the kid I saw at the picnic had a black Nintendo DS he carried in his left hand, while I cannot remember his name.

Good thing 4: I also forget the bad things, so if you do something bad and then apologize and I say, "It's forgotten," I really mean that in the literal sense.

Bad thing 5: I hate calling businesses on the phone. I am always afraid that they will ask me questions to which I don't know the answer or I will feel the pressure to answer before I've had time to think it through and balance all of the pros and cons. I don't know if I want two medium pizzas for the price of one large...what's the cost per piece difference? Is there a volume difference per slice? Would a more accurate question be a cost per ounce analysis? And then I have to decide about toppings for the second pizza and I don't know if everyone wants pepperoni. Would someone else besides me eat the Hawaiian? Too much stress.

Good thing 5: I love providing people with food, whether I make it or order it.

Well, now you know. I am filled with imperfections and I'm sure you know of others, but these are the five I felt comfortable sharing. Please don't think less of me.